It is a truth universally acknowledged that a dog wags his tail when he is happy, and thereby increases the amount of happiness in the world.
The Doggo-Corp C19-Inclusion Engine has re-imagined this process with startling results. A dog secured to the engine will generate 1,450% more wags when enhanced with the 600 Hz tail-oscillation process. This is maintained for an optimal 19-hour period, after which the dog is suitable for efficient and profitable disposal. Doggo-Corp has invested heavily in the supply of dog-units; and over the coming months will be irrevocably excluding all competitors from the global supply chain of happiness.